The truth about speed dating

May 16, 2007

A few months ago I discovered that the worst thing about speed-dating is not rejection, as most would initially think. If we think for a bit, rejection is, in fact, normal for the most of us. When we go out and fancy someone we either try nothing (pre-rejection) or we try some sort of clumsy flirt and end up being rejected. This is, at least, the most likely outcome for most of us. So, speed-dating is not bad because of rejection. That is actually what it makes normal.

The real problem with speed-dating is actually much more disturbing and is confounded with this rejection fear. In a classic speed dating evening a person gets to meet 20 people from the opposite sex in just one night. This is the first problem; too many people in one night that are single, available and willing. It would take a normal person at least 6 months to meet these many new people.

Then the second problem; you are forced to speak with all 20 of them for 3 minutes with no previous background so you spent most of the time telling and finding about the most basic background information: “What you do?”, “Where you live?”, etc. However you are still required to make judgments about them based on this flimsy evidence. Normally we wouldn’t make judgments like that. There wouldn’t be a need, but speed-dating forces that judgement. After all you need to select your love/friend interests. That is the point and that is why you are paying the entry fee.

Because of these snappy judgements the whole experience ends up being quite negative. What initially sounds like a “great opportunity to meet 20 new people”, quite rapidly descends into “I am surrounding by complete idiots”. Speed-dating makes you lose a bit of your faith in humankind – as if we needed any additional reasons – as people come out of it looking pathetic one-dimensional cartoon-like characters without anything useful to say or add to society in general.

But, I hear you say, most of us make judgement based on the first minute or so of meeting someone new, and usually this is quite reliable. I would tend to agree with this, but these first impressions are meaningful when done environments that we are used to. For example, when we meet a friend of a friend we use a lot more information than just the simple 1 minute conversation. The speed-dating environment is an artificial environment, there aren’t any other clues; in this scenario our ‘first impressions’ are terribly unreliable. So unreliable that the more you speak the worse ‘first-impression’ you generate.

It is a lose/lose battle and a truly depressing experience.


Relaxing with madness

May 8, 2007

I don’t really know why I find this video so relaxing. It shouldn’t be relaxing, right? This is basically Claude Lelouch 1976 classic “C’était un rendez-vous” on bike, in NYC, without a story and without the engine noise replace with Bandwitch by Broken Social Scene. However, I tend to find that this mixture of crazy antics by those bikers, the seemingly smooth near misses and the ubercool soundtrack drives my brain to suave land.

It is strange, but I think it makes sense. Films like this should fire me into some sort of action, but they don’t. Modern life has nullified me. Our dull lives are so unbelievably stressful, in their mighty dullness, that I need to see this kind of stuff to release some adrenalin – in the comfort of my home. This is one of the great achievements of our society; dull stuff is so incredibly boring but terribly exhausting, and only complete madness can relax us. So next time someone comes up with the theory that it is violence on TV that makes people kill other people, tell them: “No, it is the dullness of our lives that forces people to go mad”. Enjoy and relax.

The banana

May 4, 2007

I found this gem in my first adventure through GodTube. Unfortunately, WordPress doesn’t provide an easy way of having GodTube videos, so I looked for it on YouTube and there it was (as always).

This idea that the banana is the atheist nightmare is laughable, but what I really enjoyed was the strong sexual innuendos throughout the video, which is bizarre for such a religious program (I assume). Additionally, look at the guy next to the ‘banana’ guy; he seems to be laughing is head off. How come? Does he, like me, think this is silly?

Another point; as a friend pointed out, in the East people open the banana from the other side…